We were not.
This is the work of intrepid Instagrammer q.j_mom, who just can't get enough of food art! Although scrolling through her account, it's easy to see that gingerbread isn't her usual medium - most of the time, she prefers a healthier option, in the form of nori-on-cheese collages. Check these out!
Look, it's Buck-Tick!
And Kikkawa Koji!
And David Bowie!
And Boy George, looking a lot like young Imai Hisashi!
And look, here's the real Imai Hisashi!
And Hoshino Hidehiko! (Mm doesn't that stuffed chikuwa look good...?)
And here's Mr. Sakurai in a garter belt! (She hashtagged this one #sexybento)
And more Acchan-chan, saying "Eat me, eat me!" (But also eat your beans.)
Not only that, but Ms. Q. J. has also tried her hand at Serious Toast.
In addition to making "character lunches," her other main hobby appears to be crocheting silly hats for her cat. We dunno about you, kids, but we always wanted a cat whose head looks like a strawberry, and we're pretty sure Mr. Sakurai does, too (we'd ask him directly, but according to our sources, Kurumi upended a bottle of shochu all over his phone and he needs to get a new one before he can reply to our texts. This is the danger of real cats vs. watching cat videos on YouTube! Are you sure you wanted a real kitteh, Acchan-chan? Are you sure?) Look at the guilty face of this cat! She's definitely up to something wicked!
But bravo, Ms. Q. J. We applaud your brave efforts to push the boundaries of fanart further than they've ever been pushed before. Go check her out on Instagram, y'all. There's way more to be enjoyed over there.
In other news, one of our long-time readers recently emailed us to let us know that her pet bunny has become an avid Buck-Tick fan.
Michelle wrote to us from the east coast of the USA, to inform us of the following:
"Lately I started binge watching Buck-Tick videos and now my pet bunny is a fan. Seriously. On the third day she went over to the TV and stood up on her hind legs to get me to turn on the TV. Once I hit play, she did her relaxed pose, and I had to take a photo.
My bun's name is Cocoa, and she has a very sweet personality. I found it interesting that she faces the TV when I watch Buck-Tick (& The Mortal & Sakurai) concerts, but with movies and TV shows she sits off to the side often facing away from the TV. Of course rabbits have almost 360-degree vision so direction may not matter. Her ears are definitely up and attentive."
Cocoa is surely soothed by the velvet tones of Mr. Sakurai's voice, Michelle. We think that's more than abundantly clear. Welcome to Buck-Tickistan, little bunny!
No need to be lonely, either. There are other rabbits in Buck-Tickistan, too! Melissa from Belgium is the proud mama of another two:
What a charming sight! How soothing for the soul!
But what about those days when the famous and powerful oligarchs of Russian Buck-Tick fandom keep sending you jars of pickled herring with threatening letters attached, full of dark, vague pronouncements such as "In Soviet Russia, Fly High okays itself to YOU!" What's a humble gonzo tabloidist to do?
Another one of our readers had an answer for us.
Sorry, Russian fans. We're sorry for picking on you. We know you're not all alike, and that some of you okay yourselves to the fly high and not the other way around. Keep your English очень styly and save us some vodka for next time :) Cause we love you, Russia, and so does Q. J. Mom.